To Cherish….

Cherish is a word not frequently used in today’s culture and society … so when it comes to Cherishing Someone… what does it mean, and what does it look like concretely in one’s life?

To Cherish someone is to love someone, honor someone, and delight in someone because of who they are. It is in this love and honor, appreciation, and respect that you have for someone, that you hold this person very close to your heart and give them a special place in your heart. To cherish someone is to hold someone in deep esteem, yet also, to see someone’s divinity within them, while loving their humanity as well. In the moments when things do not go as planned, or in the moments when the person you love or are in love with “stumbles” it is in you being able to recognize that they stumble, and where you turn to grace to forgive, to offer mercy, or compassion or to see the better part of the person instead of overly dwelling on their weaknesses.

To Cherish someone is grounded in the biblical principles of love and mercy. God so Cherished us that God gave us Christ as a Savior…. and Christ Cherished us enough to sacrifice for us, for us to always know we are the beloved and that we are always precious in the eyes of God… as God’s children we are always precious.

To Cherish someone recognizes their justification in Christ, their redemption in Christ, even when, in their human weakness, they may fail us. When we turn to the truth of that redemption, justification, and grace and we continue to love them and see the good in them and that they were created out of… that is cherishing them. But Cherishing someone goes far deeper than that. Cherishing the person you are in love with is about loving them for the unique self that they are… recognizing that uniqueness and celebrating that uniqueness. Appreciating that persons gifts and talents, while also knowing they are not perfect… but being enamored by them anyway. Cherishing someone is standing in wonder and awe of them and being so grounded in Christ and the truth of who God is, that you overcome whatever challenges stand between you and you showing that person you choose them and honor them, and delight in them.

To Cherish a person is to hold someone dear to you, to hold them in thought, in reflection, and in your heart. When you cherish someone you highlight their strengths to others and their goodness to others and you emphasize their beauty and grace and not your own. By cherishing someone you help the person you are in love with to discover the best side of themselves and to live in joy…. you do this by highlighting the beauty of their soul to others and show their best side to others, even in moments when your significant other may not be able to see it themselves. We do this not only in the words we say to others, or giving the person we are in love with the room to be themselves, but also, by encouraging them, loving them, softly critiquing or offering a new lens for them to be able to see from when they are stuck. When you Cherish someone you are acting selflessly towards the person you are in love with, loving them for the sake of loving them, as in for the sake of themselves… and you care about their joy and your highest joy is actually giving them deep inner joy. When you cherish the person you are in love with you take pleasure in the true pleasure of the person you are in love with. You also choose to see the good instead of treating them with contempt, bitterness, or animosity. Passive-aggressive behavior does not exist when you are cherishing someone. Instead, when you cherish someone, you are lifting them up. Because you are grounded in how much God cherishes you, as a daughter or a son of God, you cherish the other so they stay in that truth as well and know that truth. One of the sure ways they know that truth and experience that truth everyday is through the way you treat them as the person you are in love with. .. This does not mean you do not see the areas where they falter… you may see them.. .and you may even have to label them for yourself… and if there is a major issue - you may have to talk through it with someone else…however, the most important person to talk it through with is the one you cherish… and to recognize and own the fact that even though they have made a mistake, you still cherish them and love them for who they are.

When we Cherish someone we listen to them, pay attention to their perspective and view it as important… We indulge the other in our attention and love, and are passionate about them….healing their wounds as we do so. But this type of being passionate about them is an eternal passion that does not go away or fade…. it stays present, and the passion for them creates deeper cherishing for them and of them….But even more importantly, when we cherish someone and they fall or stumble on their walk or path we offer understanding to the other, and we choose to see the other through the eyes of love, and willingly and joyfully give to the other, despite whatever has happened in the past. When you cherish someone, you do not hold grudges against them. Instead we open our heart wider, for greater trust, understanding, and love. Also, because we cherish someone, we are open to receiving from them as well… opening up space for the other to cherish us as well. Cherishing someone, we honor the inherent God given dignity, value, and worth of the other. The desires of the other also become important to us, we care about their health and well-being and we grow in deeper connection, communication and love as we become supportive of their God given dreams, desires, longings, and wishes. When we cherish the other, we help these to come true, and support them in coming true (as they are in alignment with God’s will). But, more deeply than that, we celebrate with them their victories, and overflow love to them, just to love them and so that they know they are cherished, we adore them as in have ardor for them.…. (albeit in a different way than we adore God - as God is the most worthy of our adoration, and is to receive our most adoration in life and praise in life). You become their biggest fan. Even more deeply, you are with them.

Cherishing someone is not just a physical response to someone, although you can physically cherish someone, and show them tenderness and affection, but rather, cherishing someone is a posture of the heart where you always hold (spiritually, emotionally, metaphorically, and physically) the other one in tenderness …they are dear to you and always close to you in spirit which frequently brings you the desire for deeper physical, spiritual, and emotional closeness to the other. You desire their physical presence because of your love for them and care for them. Cherishing someone also leads you to a deeper posture of protection towards the other…. where the other knows they will not be harmed by you or in your presence - spiritually, emotionally, or physically, and that you have their best interest at heart, that you care about them just for the sake of them being themselves. You accept them for who they are. Even if you have disagreements, or a difference of opinion, when both people cherish each other, they work together to overcome them and to have greater compassion and deeper love for each other, seeking a deeper communion with each other.

Challenge - What are some ways you can be more loving and cherishing today?

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