I see alot of people writing about Happiness and inner happiness… and how women (mostly women in particular) need to have inner joy and happiness and once they have that, everything on the outside will fall into place. Well, what if someone does have that and they take the risk and open up to someone? What if that person also gives her joy and happiness? What if something then goes wrong, and that changes? In the past, I have seen many people blame the woman - as if it is her fault that everything went wrong… that if she had had the true inner happiness and joy in herself said relationship wouldn’t have ended the way it did, etc. But, there is frequently something that is never said in these new circles of “Happiness” and the discussions on them. …. You also deserve to have joy in a relationship with someone, and for them to care about your joy, as you care about theirs. You deserve to experience joy in a relationship and be in love with them. That is a truth. Those are two of the beautiful blessings of a relationship. That you are in love - fall in love with them and they bring you joy. Yes you should have happiness also and be able to have happiness and create your own happiness - and inner joy ~ but there is a whole other piece to this - you should also be able to have these things in a relationship with someone else and there is nothing wrong with you if you do. It is not the case that you only get joy and happiness from the inside, and that that is the only joy and happiness God ever wants you to have. No. I have also seen the trick of blaming a woman saying: If only you really loved yourself…. Really? Because I guy breaks up with a girl she doesn’t love herself? In what land? Guys break up with girls all the time, and girls still love themselves.. and know their value and worth in the eyes of God. By saying “if only you loved yourself” you give whoever broke up with the girl a free pass to not take ownership or responsibility in the relationship, if something went wrong. Always blaming a girl for the failures in a relationship isn’t always the reason why a relationship falls apart. For people who already love themselves, and know their value and worth in the eyes of God, know that they are worthy of happiness and joy in a relationship, and that more happiness and joy comes to them in the relationship if they care about the other person’s happiness and joy as well as their own. But also relationships are full of ups and downs. Every relationship. And the person you are with should bring you joy. And you should be able to feel free enough to fall in love with them and they enjoy that, and you enjoy that. You can have inner happiness and want outer happiness too, and you can have both inner and outer happiness and joy in your life. You can also be with someone who cares about your joy and happiness, as you care about their joy and happiness as well. This person is usually someone you want to share your life with. If they really love you they will care about your happiness and they will care about what bring you joy. They will want to see you enjoying the things you enjoy, just as you want to see them enjoying the things they enjoy …. see this, being involved in this, being present with you while you enjoy these things, will delight the person that is in love with you, and the person that is in love with you will be delighted to see you delighted. It goes deeper than that though.

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