True Love: A 1 Corinthians 13:4–8a Love: Love is Patient, but I'm Not... Pt III

A 1 Corinthians 13:4–8a Love ~

True Love and marriage is Joy. Joy is an expansion of the heart …this is fostered in true love and in marriage, leading to abiding joy in love. Christopher West emphasizes every marriage filled with true love is a “salvation story/Salvation history.” This includes God’s unconditional and infinitely merciful love for you. God’s unconditional and merciful love opens us up to share love with others, but also it is the foundation of the church, as well as marriage. This does not mean people are perfect in the marriage, or that couples themselves are perfect. … Imperfection is part of the art of marriage and unconditional love.

This witness to love shows boundless love to others. Love is that which is the foundation of all in the world. Love is a reflection of the divine in the world… and an expression of God’s divine love for us

Love bears all things

Love cherishes the good of the others. This includes their health, well-being, their feelings, emotions, thoughts, words, as well as the way they are treated, spoken to or spoken about, as well as all that leads to a life full of the fruits of the Holy Spirit. Being in Love is a reflection of your cherishing the other….

When you need to be regrounded or need clarity, write a letter to Jesus about everything that is going on, and God will begin to step in, and heal. Through love, and while in a truly loving relationship, we are able to have compassion and empathy for others. God can turn pain into compassion, and create miraculous shifts in anyone’s life. Through prayer for the other, grace is able to step in.

In a relationship based on true love, you are able to look past the faults of the one you are in love with. You pray for them, and love them even though they are not perfect. Every person has both light and darkness… everyone sins… we are human. Although we try not to sin, we still sin. However this does not stop God’s love for us. God will always redirect our course…so that we are more loving, and we are able to live and love in a better way. Grace and mercy are the two things that help overcome evil.

“Love does not have to be perfect for us to value it. The other person loves me as best they can, with all their limits, but the fact that love is imperfect does not mean that it is untrue or unreal. It is real, albeit limited and earthly. If I expect too much, the other person will let me know, for he or she can neither play God nor serve all my needs. Love coexists with imperfection. It ‘bears all things’ and can hold it’s peace before the limitations of the loved one” (113). Instead, you begin to Cherish the other.

According to Pope Francis: “marriage points us to the ultimate end and definitive dimension of our human existence. Married couples will come to see the deeper meaning of their journey through this life; marriage in this life is meant to prepare us for the eternal marriage that awaits us in the next life. This means as beautiful and as fulfilling as human love can be, marriage is not our ultimate fulfillment. It is a sacrament of the definitive love of God.” (The Joy of Love; 325)

Furthermore, spouses are able to experience that marriage is worth it, because they achieved some good, learned something as a couple, or came to appreciate what they have. Few human joys are as deep and thrilling as those experienced by two people who love one another and have achieved life together as a result of a great, shared effort.” (The Joy of Love, 130)

Love believes all things

Love believes all things, and when it believes all things, it means it trusts…. (it believes all things good and trusts). “Love trusts, it sets free; it does not try to control, possess and dominate everything. This freedom, which fosters independence, an openness to the world around us and to new experiences, can only enrich and expand relationships. The spouses then share with one another the joy of all they have received and learned outside the family circle. (115).

When in a relationship based on true love, couples walk in truth, love, trust and belief, and life begins to blossom, flourish and grow. If someone is controlling and not loving, it will cause the relationship to wither and die. For relationships to flourish and grow it takes believing in the good of the other person, and when the other person fails, or when the relationship is having difficulty it is in showing compassion and mercy to the other. This also takes a revolution of tenderness, to draw the other into the tenderness of God, and the relationship into the tenderness of God. Conversations that are had when something goes wrong, need to be had in tenderness… and in the tenderness of God. We are aware that many couples struggle with discussing certain things with their significant other…however, in the tenderness of God, and in tenderness, mercy, and compassion, you are able to have these conversations, to listen to the other and overcome whatever the issue is before both of you. These conversations lead to and are Cherishing the other. Once you know of the tenderness of God, you are able to be tender to the person you are in love with and cherish them.

Love hopes all things

When we say Love hopes all things, this means that love believes in the good of the other, and is willing to work through whatever issues are present. Love does not just turn a blind eye to what is happening. “Instead, with full reckoning of the evils and sufferings of this world, hope is unwaveringly confident that God can and will transform all those evils and sufferings in to glory (93). Because love hopes all things, we know that God is victorious against evil, and can transform any situation, overcome any obstacle, and to turn any evil situation, towards the good. Good always wins, and always overcomes evil. “Love hopes all things because it is inextricably plugged into the current of Christ’s Passover from sorrow to joy, from agony to ecstasy, from mourning to laughing, from humiliation to exaltation, from rupture to communion, and from death to new life.

In marriage, not everything is perfect… and spouses do hurt each other’s feelings sometimes, but this does not stop good from overcoming whatever evil is present or whatever sufferings are present. “The virtue of hope responds to the aspirations of happiness which God has placed in the heart of every man (Catechism). This hope leads to a deeper cherishing of the other.

Love endures all things

“This means that love bears every trial with a positive attitude. It stands firm in hostile surroundings. This “endurance” involves not only the ability to tolerate certain aggravations, but something greater: a constant readiness to confront any challenge. It is a love that ‘never gives up', even in the darkest hour. It shows a certain dogged heroism, a power to resist every negative current, an irrepressible commitment to goodness.”(118)

In marriage and a relationship that is based on true love, the struggle to overcome things together, and to endure the trials of life, are so much easier when you have each other to bear them with. In your unity with each other, you are able to overcome the obstacles of life together. This is one of the reasons why it is so important to continuously create and deepen your unity with each other… and to allow the Holy Spirit to move through your relationship with each other.

When there are trials and tribulations in your relationship with each other, be united to God in prayer, and God will reveal to you the ways you are to in and to overcome the problem… additionally, God always remains faithful. So even if things go wrong in your relationship, God is faithful… and will lead you through… in the direction God wants you to go in.

Love endures all things for the sake of transforming all that the world endures into love. This is the miracle of the cross, and the miracle of love.

Even in cases where marriages or relationships fall apart…. remember that the strong person is the person who can cut off the chain of hate, the chain of evil…and inject within the very structure of the universe that strong and powerful element of love. It overcomes hurt with love. With prayer, and drawing closer to God, you will radiate love… even if a marriage is unable to be healed, falls apart, and ends in divorce. Remember you are here to reflect the light of God/Christ… and the light of God/Christ is love.

Based on Love is Patient, but, I am Not by Christopher West )

With Analysis, Insight, Writing and Perspective by Mary E. Grenchus

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